Note: this is not a political post. I try to respect everyone’s opinion. I am only using this because I feel it is a powerful example of finding your voice.
On January 21, 2017, women and their supporters gathered to march for women’s rights here in the United States. They were joined by others all across the world.
These women had something to say and by marching, they gained a voice with which to say it.
What About You? Do You Have a Voice?
I was a shy, quiet child growing up. I rarely spoke unless spoken to, and was encouraged by my parents to be a good girl and just go along, never, ever voicing my opinion, especially if it was contrary to others.
When I was in my teens, I saw the protests taking place across the country, mostly about Viet Nam, but I was too young to join, and never would have anyway.
What about you? Can you relate to what I’m saying?
I’m not talking just about big things, like protests, but little things too. Especially little things.
How often has someone asked you what movie you want to see or what restaurant you want to go to?
Do you give them an answer, or do you reply, “I don’t care.”?
Do you really not care, or are you just trying to “go along”?
Don’t express an opinion because someone might disagree. Don’t say what you want to see or eat or do because then someone might do it with you and not like it and then it would be your fault.
Is that what we think of ourselves? (I’m guilty of it too).
And what do you think that is telling others about ourselves and how they should treat us?
Oh, it’s just me. I’m a doormat. Feel free to walk all over me and treat my anyway you want, cause I’ll never say anything. I’m too afraid to express my opinion. Someone might get mad.
Maybe You Should Find Your Voice
How different do you think your life might be if you could freely and easily express your opinion now and then? And I don’t mean being overly opinionated and rude, just expressing yourself honestly and respectfully.
You know what? If someone asks you where you want to eat, and you get brave and mention a Chinese restaurant, they might say they prefer Italian. Is that so bad? Frightening?
You have a discussion and you end up somewhere that’s appealing to you both.
It’s OK for you to express your opinion on things. You can do that without being abrasive or mean; it’s merely an exchange of ideas.
As women, I think many of us have been taught to be quiet and polite. That’s OK, we can do that, but we don’t have to be so polite that we cease to have an opinion.
Did you know that at one time the man was expected to make all of the decisions for the woman? He chose the restaurant and what she would have to eat. Can you imagine?
How ADHD Masks Your Voice
ADHD affects us in so many ways. We are different from most other people. We think differently, sometimes we behave differently, and we mess up a lot.
All of that added together takes a toll on our self esteem. We tend to have lower self esteem than people who do not have ADHD.
So of course, when given the opportunity to express our opinion, we may shy away.
Can we try not to do that anymore?
That kind of behavior diminishes us in so many ways. It makes us more vulnerable to those who would seek to control us.
We are better than that.
We are more intelligent and talented than we know or dare to believe.
Make me a promise. The next time someone asks you for your opinion, give it to them.
And if they don’t like it, simply smile and say, “I’m sorry you feel that way.”.
End of discussion.