What does it mean to be confident?
Confidence comes from feelings of well-being, acceptance
of your body and mind (self-esteem), and belief in your own ability, skills and experience.
Those of us with ADHD are often lacking in confidence, for a number of reasons.
People who are confident share these important characteristics:
Confident people are capable. They know they are good enough, competent, and can handle life’s situations.
Admitting you are capable also means knowing that if you cannot handle a situation completely on your own; you can find out where to get the necessary help, information, or skill.
Knowing you are your greatest resource protects you from stress. Believing you are capable means that whatever the task, you will handle it. By believing in yourself, you can face life with complete assurance.
O – OWN IT
Confident people own their opinions, emotions, feelings, words, and even choice of dessert.
You’re you, you want what you want, and you do what you do. No apologies. No explanation.
N – NURTURE THEMSELVES
Confident people believe in their value and worth. They feel they are worth the time, money and energy required to nurture and support themselves in their fulfillment and growth.
This could be things like taking a class to learn something new, taking time out to exercise, having quiet time to re-energize and rejuvenate, or pampering themselves with a massage or manicure.
F- FULLY PRESENT
Confident people engage in the present moment when they are with others. They are not concerned about think about how they look, sound, feel or smell.
Constantly thinking about what you feel or look like takes you out of the moment. Practice not thinking about the past or the future. Concentrate on what’s in front of you — there’s probably something exciting about it.
Confident people are true to themselves. They honor who they really are and will do things that honor their true selves, despite what others may say or think. When people are true to themselves they feel more comfortable, and that produces confidence.
D – DEMEANOR
People with confidence have a physical presence. It shows in their posture, body language, eye contact, and dress.
If you look like a confident, capable person, people will treat you accordingly, and eventually you will start to feel it too.
Confident people don’t give up. They take risks, know they will make mistakes, and that sometimes they will fail.
Everyone makes mistakes and fails. If you don’t, you’re not trying hard enough. Don’t think of these as mistakes and failures as negatives, but rather as learning opportunities. Because confident people remember that beneath their failures, mistakes and missteps, they are capable.
N – NOT ARROGANT
Confident people are not arrogant. Arrogance is detrimental to interpersonal relationships. For people who are confident it’s not about getting the praise, attention, or being better than others.
Confident people lift others up. They give others credit for their work, encourage progress, and offer compliments and sincere praise.
T- TAKE ACTION
Confident people take action. We all want to do or try certain things but fear we may fail. These feelings are normal. The difference is that a confident person will act on their ambitions and desires and will not let the fear of failure stop them.
The more we take action, the more our confidence grows. We try something and are successful, and the next time around it feels easier to do it again.
Confidence Activity: “Who Am I?”
Just as every snowflake is one-of-a-kind, so are you. There is no one else like you.
Of all the 7 billion people in the world, there is none other than you.
No one else feels completely the way you do. No one else sees things as you.
No one has had the same experiences as you. You are extraordinarily unique.
To further explore and discover your true self, answer the following statements:
1. I am…
2. I am at my best when…
3. The best thing that could happen to me is…
4. People notice that…
5. When I am proud of myself, I…
6. I am very happy that…
7. I get lost in time when…
8. I look forward to…
9. I am passionate about…
10. I am good at…
11. I wish others knew…
12. I am happiest when…
13. I am proud that…
14. I would like to…
15. Five adjectives that describe me are…
Please take the time and do this exercise! Get a journal, a spiral notebook, whatever, and just do it! You will be glad you did!
photo credit: barbasboth 98b — Tramaine via photopin (license)