Note: this post may make a few twists and turns along the way, but hopefully in the end it will make sense. Hey, you’ve got ADD – you’ll figure it out.
Yesterday was one of those days. You know the kind – it was too long, and too stressful, and there was too much to do. And most of it involved being away from home, which made it worse for me.
At some point during the day, I decided to check my email with my cell phone. I didn’t know it at the time, but apparently when I check my email this way, it deletes it from the system and it never goes to my laptop email program.
The reason that I’m writing this is that yesterday I received a very lovely email from a new reader. She told me how happy she was to find my blog and how she could relate to so much that I’ve written. (Thank you.)
She mentioned that she had been gifted with depression along with her ADHD and that she struggled with low self esteem. If you can relate to this, raise your hand. I would put both in the air but then I couldn’t type.
Anyway, this reader had a question for me and I thought that I would share the answer with all of you because maybe you need to hear it too. Also, since my phone lost the email, I have no other way of responding. (If you are the one you sent it, please re-send it.)
So this nice lady – like I suspect many of us do – mentioned that she often would offer others advice if she thought that she could help, and that sometimes people came to her for help too.
She was thinking about becoming a coach but was afraid that with her self esteem issues and depression, she wouldn’t be good enough.
You know, I became a coach because I found myself helping people all the time. I just naturally reached out when I could to share what I knew and try to help. When I found there was an actual profession called coaching, I jumped at it.
I’ve been coaching professionally for over 10 years now and I’ve got a confession to make: I have depression too (you knew that) and I struggle a lot (even now) with being good enough.
Yes, some days I still wonder if I’m good enough to do what I do. Who am I to tell you how to manage your ADHD when there are doctors and other professionals out there who could do it instead?
But I do, because it’s my nature to want to help and because I know how hard it can be and how helpful it is to have someone who’s been there lead the way for you.
And you know what? I would be doing that even if I weren’t a coach.
So, I have a few words of wisdom for one of my newest readers. Some of it from me and some is from other people.
First – YES – you are good enough to be a coach, and your self esteem issues and depression shouldn’t stand in the way. Just like me, you do it anyway. You’re a natural coach.
Second, from Dave Navarro:
Unless you are committed to being a quitter, “I’m not good enough” is bull**** you’re hiding behind. First of all, you’re better than you give yourself credit for because I know you’re taking yourself for granted. Second, you can’t tell me you can’t get better. Maybe you’re not willing to, but that’s “won’t,” not “can’t.” Practice and training can make anyone with a pulse better.
? Unless you actually trying to defraud people, you have no reason to see yourself a fraud. You have certain skills you can offer the world, and whether or not you don’t appreciate them, other people can. You may not see yourself as a 10 on the old sliding scale, maybe you’re a 5, but let me tell you this: To people who are a 0, 1 or 2, your 5 might as well be a 10. You have value they need.
And finally, from a wonderful, wise woman who calls herself Sinclair:
We forget that everything is potentially challenging. You just chose this kind of challenge. And you are totally up to the task or you wouldn’t want it so much. I’m calling it Sinclair’s Law: you wouldn’t want to accomplish It if some part of you wasn’t already capable of it.
So stop wondering if you’re good enough and know that YOU ARE.