What is a Tribe?
I’m sure you’ve heard the word “tribe” before, but do you really know what it means? And more importantly, do you have one? Who’s in your tribe?
Merriam-Webster defines a tribe as
a group of persons having a common character, occupation, or interest
We, as ADD women, could be considered a tribe, although I think, in the true sense, a tribe would be people you interact with on a regular basis. And I think that it also includes a sense of community or something even closer.
I have a good friend who has ADHD and we understand each other so well.But since there are only two of us, I think we are not enough to be a tribe.
The Value of a Tribe
Once, when I was in college, my psychology professor announced to our class that she was looking for people who were good at math for a side project that she had with Daimler Chrysler.
I happen to be really good with math and expressed my interest.
It turned out to be a job tutoring auto workers, currently working on the assembly line, who were interested in taking the skilled trades exam.
The best part was working with her and the people she had chosen to work for her.
I don’t say this to brag, but I have often had to “dumb myself down” based on the company I was in, and what was worse – I was doing it to make them feel more comfortable!
In this group, I could be myself! It was eye opening and so freeing.
Those people were my tribe.
When you can completely be who you are, and people accept you, understand you, and just are like you – it’s wonderful.
I don’t think that those of us with ADHD have often felt that way.
How Do You Find Your Tribe?
Well, I guess that depends on which tribe you’re looking for, because you have more than one.
If you have a close extended family, that could be considered a tribe. No need looking for them.
If you have a particular interest, like genealogy research or knitting, you might be able to find a group in your community. Maybe at the library or community center.
There are support groups for grief, losing a child, divorce, and many others. You could find your tribe there if that applies to you.
But how do you find your tribe when you have ADHD?
Well you can start with Facebook.
An ADD Woman has a (very small) group there. You are welcome to join and find your tribe.
There is also a group called That ADHD Life (for women) on Facebook.
What’s in it for Me?
Oh, so much!
Have you ever met someone and felt like you’ve known them your whole life? You could talk for hours, had lots in common, felt the same way about certain things?
That person is part of your tribe.
Imagine having a group of people who understood you, really, really understood. Who’d been there and knew what it was like.
You could do or say something dumb and they wouldn’t judge, maybe not even bat an eye, because they had said dumb things before too.
You could relax.
You could be yourself.
It’s fun and freeing and it’s so good that everyone should get to experience it at least once in their life.
Do you have a tribe? Do you know who they are and why you’re a tribe?
I hope so.
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